The Perfect personal JD

I was thinking about the way we market our jobs and how to better them and then it occured to me!! What if I posted a personals ad as we do a job. I'd bet I'd have women lining up for the job as we do for the jobs we post for our highly sought after Business Analysts or Software Architects. Here is what I thought it would look like: , o' M# q  r4 {% o5 u" y, m
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Business Title: Housewife; C! P6 }3 S0 G9 N5 r! X* a6 ^% O2 R
Job Requisition: #12531BR
" ]/ t  ]3 Z+ f# r, K; p  lFull/part time: Full-time, V' h( Y# B8 [* M8 {  R
Job Function: Homemaker
- }" R* t7 l4 H! sBusiness Unit: Homemaker Services
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City: Hometown, USA
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Job Description:& C5 S. ]/ M6 V, g6 O) ]# I8 @

" w; F2 _" A& n  E# x, D- Q' F7 _Need top talent for the natural and most fulfilling role for a lady. Primary role is that of child-care providers, supporting the children's physical, intellectual, and emotional development. The perfect candidate can be found in cooperative preschools and volunteering in numerous community organizations. This position is requires all shifts. May be called to work any shift any time.
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6 q+ O: r0 Q* K5 p" RKey Responsibilities:
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Must have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time. Must make time to prepare self as to be refreshed when husband arrives home. Must be able to hold interesting conversation to offset boring days at the office. Must gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper, etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables. Over the cooler months of the year must prepare and light a fire for to unwind by.
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Must wash the children's hands and faces, comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. Must minimize/ eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum upon husband’s arrival. Must know that husband’s topics of conversation are more important. 6 X7 _- g: F( B  n" |

* G5 q( Y1 I1 ANever complain, whine or nag. Must be able to communicate well to address concerns and resolve issues.: G) Z% u$ t% j4 N. Q1 J

6 e7 u. C/ l  ?& cQualifications:
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Associates Degree in homemaking or equivalent work experience
0 y* |! o- M+ _' eAbility to manage multiple projects simultaneously* x- A; ]" _, c9 J
Ability to support husband’s needs
& u" H% O  t* B+ o- {+ ]0 w4 IAbility to shop, cook, clean
5 z( B9 {, Y$ p( j9 G+ I2 G4 {Attention to fine details
- Q. C# L+ u8 I0 h) DExperience with yard work, home repairs, money managing is preferred